Proverbs 11:13 - Homiletics

The tale-bearer

Tale-bearing may result from spite and malice, or it may be an incident of idle gossip; but even in its milder phases it is a most mischievous practice, and one deserving of severe reprobation. Connected with what are called the minor moralities of life, the evil of it is far too little recognized by many Christian people, people who undoubtedly, endeavour on the whole to square their conduct with right principles. It is very important, therefore, that the character of this very common fault should be exposed.

I. WHEN CONFIDENCE HAS BEEN REPOSED , TALE - BEARING IS SHAMEFULLY DISHONOURABLE . All of us admit in the abstract that it is mean and dastardly to betray confidence. But the practice is terribly frequent with people whose character should be proof against it. Of course, no man of principle would deliberately worm a secret out of an innocent, trusting friend for the very purpose of blazing it abroad. But there are cases in which the evil is less clearly recognized.

1 . Confidence may be implied when it is not expressed. A man need not say in so many words that he is telling us a secret, and bind us over to keep silent by solemn promises, in order to put us under an obligation not to betray his confidence. If he evidently trusts us, calls us into his counsels as an exceptional privilege of friendship, and tells us what we know he would not wish us to make public, the duty not to repeat his words is scarcely less binding. If, through being admitted into a man's house, we have discovered the skeleton in his cupboard, by accepting his hospitality, we are pledged not to reveal it.

2 . Confidence may be betrayed through carelessness. If any one lends a jewel to a friend, he is required not only not to sell it, but not to leave it exposed to the danger of theft. Confidence is a jewel. It must be guarded. Should we through recklessness reveal what is entrusted to us, we are culpable. Two practical considerations:

II. WHEN CONFIDENCE HAS NOT BEEN REPOSED , TALE - BEARING IS UNCHARITABLE .

1 . It is unkind, even if nothing damaging to character is said. We may know many innocent things about a man which it would be highly unbecoming to make public. The modest will respect decency of soul as well as of body. The veil of mental reserve is a requirement which should distinguish the civilized man from the savage as much as the clothing of his body. One of the penalties of royalty is the exposure of private. and home life in "the fierce light that beats upon a throne." Unhappily, this evil grows upon public characters; and the tendency of "society papers" to pander to idle curiosity with personal gossip about celebrities is one of the most unwholesome habits of our day.

2 . It is often injurious when no harm is meant. The report is misunderstood, or it is unfairly judged by going forth without the lights and shares of accompanying circumstances, like a text without its context. Thus a deed appears harsh which would be condoned if the causes which led up to it were all known. Like a rolling snowball, rumour grows as it progresses through the world. The love of dramatic effect unconsciously colours the "simple, round, unvarnished tale," till the author could no longer recognize it.

3 . It is ungenerous when it is a true tale of guilt. We are not called to tell all the evil which we know of our neighbours. Charity would hide it. It is most inhuman to take pleasure in the vivisection of character. On the other hand, we must bear in mind that it is sometimes our duty to speak out unpleasant truths, as in bearing witness to a crime from obligations of justice, and in giving a servant's character; untruthfulness in the latter case is dishonest, unjust to employers, and directly unfair to persons of good character by the depreciation of the value of truthful testimonials in the loss of confidence in all such documents.

In conclusion, see how injurious tale-bearing is to the tale-bearer.

1 . It rouses retaliation. Who among us can defy the tongue of slander thus provoked?

2 . It degrades the mind. Wordsworth has described the lowering influence of narrow personal talk in contrast with conversation on topics of larger, nobler interest—

" Sweetest melodies

Are those that are by distance made more sweet.

Whose mind is but the mind of his own eyes,

He is a slave—the meanest we can meet."